Amok time: Elementary kids' behavior is out of control, say teachers

More children are coming to elementary school unable -- or unwilling -- to pay attention, sit "criss-cross applesauce" to listen to a book or "use your words" instead of punching a classmate, say teachers. They complain of "increasingly severe — behavior problems in young children," including lashing out physically at classmates and teachers, reports Hechinger's Jackie Mader.

Andrea Quinn, who's taught first grade at the same Northern California school for 21 years, says she noticed a change in students' maturity and independence in the last 10 years. They're more likely to interrupt, less able to ask for help. The pandemic made it worse.

Her students are more "physical," less able to have trouble interacting with each other. Quinn tries to affirm positive behavior rather than shaming kids for acting out. “I’m just one person,” She told Mader. “My real purpose is to teach them content. … I’m not trained in psychology. I’m not trained in social work."

Pandemic disruptions may be to blame, writes Mader. "Toddlers who were born during the pandemic had significantly lower verbal, motor and overall cognitive performance compared to toddlers born in the previous decade," according to a 2021 Brown study. "Pandemic babies" and "Covid kids" are now in school.

In addition, children are "on screens now more than ever, which is believed to contribute to more anxiety, depression, aggression and hyperactivity."

At the same time, kindergarten has become more focused on academics -- it's been "the new first grade" for years now -- with less time for free play.

Today's kindergarteners "learned to babble to masked adults," writes Nick Gaehde on The 74. "They spent their toddler years on video calls with grandparents instead of at storytime in the local library. Many started preschool only to have it disrupted by quarantines or staffing shortages."

Eighty-two percent of kindergarten teachers in a Lexia survey last fall said their "students are less socially and emotionally ready for kindergarten than past cohorts," he writes. They have less practice in sharing, self-regulation and cooperation.

Children have shorter attention spans, 89 percent said, and 73 percent said "today’s kindergarteners are behind in early literacy skills compared with students five years ago."

"When young children miss out on opportunities to play with peers or listen to stories in groups . . . they lose practice in waiting their turn, following a sequence and engaging with other minds," Gaehde writes. "These are the invisible threads that tie social-emotional development to literacy."

Some blame "gentle parenting," especially in its internet form, for encouraging parents to raise children who aren't used to follow rules.

Teach your child the meaning of "no," kindergarten teacher Emily Perkins (@emmymckenny) says in a TikTok video. Children who think "no" is is an invitation to argue are "basically unteachable," she says.

Perkins' video got a lot of support in the comment section, writes Emily Schiffer on Upworthy.

"Preschool teacher here. you are 10000000000% correct. Let them struggle a bit so they can ACTUALLY do hard things. Let them experience disappointment! make them resilient!" one wrote.

"THIS!! I’m a first year kindergarten teacher and some of this littles just don’t get no… it’s so wild to me."

A Macaroni Kids' story on parenting tends "extreme 'never say no' parenting" is "out" in 2026. "Parents are done feeling bad for having rules." According to the story, "Calm, confident, kind parenting" -- "boundaries with empathy" -- is "in."