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  • Writer's pictureJoanne Jacobs

How to win a Nobel Prize

Science is all about the posters, reports The Onion.

STOCKHOLM—Anxiously awaiting critiques from the judges, the world’s leading scientists nervously stood next to their poster-board displays Thursday as the Nobel Committee made its way through a gymnasium, inspecting their projects. “I stayed up all night cutting out stenciled letters, mounting my results on construction paper, and using glue stick to get these cryo-electron microscope images onto my poster board,” said molecular biologist Richard Henderson, eyeing his competitors’ various displays of wind tunnels, volcanoes, and mathematical models illustrating the exponential expansion of space following the Big Bang.

Sources told The Onion that theoretical physicist and cosmologist Alan Guth was “disqualified after the committee concluded his parents had clearly done most of the work for him.”

In The Atlantic, Kristina Rizga writes about a teacher in rural Oklahoma who started a “science fair dynasty.”

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