Comments on: No waiting for hyperactive kids

By: Deirdre Mundy

Deirdre Mundy — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 22:44:44 +0000

My brother and I had true ADHD– we still ahd to wait in lines. But it was helpful to have a bit more space so we could pace, spin, jump, etc.etc. ADHD kids CAN wait in line without freaking out–they just need wiggle room.

A better solution might be roomier lines…….

ADHD isn’t just poor discipline, but for most kids it’s not an insurmountable obstacle—it takes these kids more time to learn self-control (or less disruptive fidgeting behaviors….) So yes, choose lines carefully, let them bounce around and sing in line, and make sure it’s a line for a ride they WANT to go on. (Playing games in line helps too!)

But let them go to the front? No WAY! My daughter is ADHD too, and I want her to learn to ‘pass’ in society, so she can have an actual life. Giving ADHD kids an easy way out is just forcing them to go through life as a behavioral cripple.

On the other hand, we ARE homeschooling, since her organizational/behavioral skills are not up to par with her academic sckills. So we’re working hard on appropriate behaviors and socially acceptable coping skills. But we still expect decent behavior out and about.

We do try to choose ‘fun’ activities that make it easy for her to behave. But she’s already at the point where she could probably handle an amusement park on a cloudy weekday…as long as we only stayed 3 or 4 hours and watched what she ate….

Anyway, while ADHD is a lifelong ailment, kids CAN and SHOULD learn to cope in normal life situations. Parents who take the easy way to the front of the line NOW are just making their kids’ lives harder LATER.

By: JOHN THOMPSON

JOHN THOMPSON — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 15:11:03 +0000

This is a very complicated issue. I don’t have “answers” except the creation of a respectful learning culture encourages common decency.

Too much of this discussion has been cruel.

By: Don

Don — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 14:34:41 +0000

In my professional experience, most of what is labeled as ADHD is actually just lack of discipline. Not all, however. The genuine condition is real and serious. BUT – even for those with the genuine condition, they need to learn to live in society, and this kind of thing DOES NOT HELP!

By: Mark G.

Mark G. — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 04:52:27 +0000

Mrs. C makes good points. Also, we have to realize that there are kids with “real” ADHD, the true brain chemistry issues which are organic and persistent… and then there are kids who are given that label for a variety of reasons…it gets more funding for schools is often a claim, but I also recall reading some interesting discussion about the natural variation in the way that kids’ brains develop…some of those kids “diagnosed” with ADHD are simply developing at a rate which is incongruous with the expectations of the school system. There is natural variation in the way kids develop psychosocially and biologically, and some of those outliers get the label when what they really need is time to develop. I think we’re way too quick to “diagnose” in the US.

By: Mrs. C

Mrs. C — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 03:57:56 +0000

Wow. There are a lot of misunderstandings out there! And CW, YES, I have seen plenty of people say that you don’t have to go on an airplane/ go home in comments sections of other blogs. When does it end?

I have a non-verbal autistic child who would NOT function on a line. Should he never go to the amusement park? Never? Because it’s not a “right?”

I understand that things like this could be abused easily. But no reason that, say, someone like me could have staff help by checking in and saying, we can’t wait ON THE LINE physically, but we will be over here waiting for our turn. If the wait time is half an hour, we can be waved over in half an hour. Some places I’ve seen they give necklaces to the person who would have been on line BEHIND them, and then wave the special-needs family on that way when the fellow with the necklace gets to the front of the line.

I sure wouldn’t want to hog everything with a me-first attitude. But I also wouldn’t want my child to NEVER, never have the experience other kids do because his disability is difficult in this way.

I think we’re mixing up severe, severe medical problems with the simple ADHD/ Johnny doesn’t sit still in class kind of thing. I’m just advocating for a little grace sometimes.

By: Michael

Michael — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 23:19:08 +0000

What we dont want to do is reward negative behavior on a consistent basis as that will only reinforce the negative behavior (ADHD or NO ADHD) So I am wondering….a child may have the opportunity to go to a theme park maybe once a year if he/she is very fortunate…will that occasion make such a big impact effecting the way the behavior is managed the rest of the year??? Probably not. What is more important is the focus on the other 364 days out of the year. (3 positive interactions for every 1 negative interaction can be very powerful in shaping behavior)
So if they want to let ADHD kids go to the front of the line, fine. Personally I would only be for it in more severe cases…but lets get real, we are all BORED OUT OF OUR MINDS in line…why cant the have entertainment in lines for us like the do in NY city. Ever waited in line to see the Statue of Liberty? The Street performers were like a mini circus.

By: anon

anon — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 23:08:28 +0000

“It looks as though the accommodation offered by the amusement park is similar to what might be offered to someone with a physical infirmity who gets a preferred parking space.”

It is nonsensical, indeed shameful, to compare someone classified as ADHD with someone who has a physical infirmity. Darren is correct to ask what happened to the nation that brought civilization to the far corners of the planet. Answer: It became soft, weak, and unable to set standards.

By: Crimson Wife

Crimson Wife — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 17:57:38 +0000

I agree with Jane- if you’ve got an ADHD kid, don’t bring him/her to an amusement park with long lines.

Now if we were talking about allowing families with ADHD kids to bypass long airport security lines, that I could understand permitting. Families don’t have a choice about going through airport security the way they do about visiting an amusement park.

By: Jane

Jane — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 16:58:14 +0000

It sounds as if this is about the revenue enhancement more than it’s about the ADHD kids’ needs. KateC made the good point that medication and behavior mod work better than discipline (although the idea that ADHD kids are incapable of discipline is offensive). The bigger picture (and this is taking the behavior mod path): if there’s an ADHD kid in your family (as there is in mine), spend as little time as possible at amusement parks (as compared to other fun recreational experiences); choose uncrowded days; choose uncrowded rides; choose only one long line per day, if any; involve the child in choosing which long line s/he chooses to tolerate; have something to occupy her/his hands; you get the picture. The “jump to the head of the line” option ought to be for kids (like those with autism) who have not just self-control issues but also understanding issues. If a child with normal intelligence and understanding is always being jumped to the head of the line because of a diagnosis of ADHD, s/he is being taught a) that s/he’s broken, and b) that s/he’s entitled.

By: KateC

KateC — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 16:43:57 +0000

It’s hard to learn effective coping skills when your brain and your body are pulsing. ADHD isn’t behaviour, it’s brain chemistry. Discipline doesn’t work, medication and behaviour mod do. A place in line ticket makes much more sense (and is probably a better idea, in terms of revenue enhancement, too) than forcing kids to stand around like statues.