The Onion on abstinence ed

From an Onion poll asking why abstinence education doesn’t work:

Xander Griffey,
Construction Worker
“I find it astonishing that our public schools were unable to beat out the most basic human instinct that perpetuates our species.”

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  1. Hunter McDaniel says:

    You left this one out.
    Kurt Dobler,
    Dog Trainer
    “To give the course some credit, it is by far the easiest to teach.”
    I realize this is The Onion, but the serious point is that when teaching kids a simple rule is better than trying to be “nuanced”.

    My position is that the schools shouldn’t be involved in sex education in the first place. I don’t like abstinence education, nor do I like teaching kids how to put condoms on bananas. So I guess that puts me in agreement with the other interviewee:
    Penelope Schaal,
    “That’s it. From now on my kids will learn about sex the way I did–from a grabby uncle.”