Comments on: It’s all about them

By: Word Around the Net

Word Around the Net — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 19:40:23 +0000

YOU’RE SPECIAL!…

There was a fundamental shift in education that happened a generation ago. Instead of being primarily interested in producing children who were well educated, the focus became a concern that children were well-adjusted and had the proper viewpoint on l…

By: Indigo Warrior

Indigo Warrior — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 19:06:12 +0000

These so-called narcissists, egotists, solipsists, etc. and other lone-wolf tribalists really need to have a good reading of Ayn Rand’s The Virtue of Selfishness.

By: Larry Strauss

Larry Strauss — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 15:45:50 +0000

I agree, Gabe.
Dismissing of an entire generation is a slipery slope.

How about all the young soldiers in Iraq?

Some of them are using My Space too. So what? They need a little of their own space….

And for everyone else perhaps My Space and the rest of the electronic self-expression is as much a response to a fragmented and alienating culture as it is a symptom of narcissism.

By: GradSchoolMom

GradSchoolMom — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 15:23:29 +0000

Keep in mind that the definition of Narcissism is a false belief in one’s self-worth. Narcissists are usually the least self-confident. That is the result of always being told you’re great when you know it isn’t true.

By: ben

ben — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 14:54:25 +0000

Gabe,
Did your dad’s academic performance dramatically increase between the guidance counselors comments and when he went to college? Also I bet if your mother’s physics class was graded on todays scale her grade would be a B+. People need truthful feedback to make choices about their lives.

By: ricki

ricki — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 13:45:04 +0000

Well, there’s a difference in having self-WORTH (feeling you are fit to walk the surface of the earth, which everyone should feel) and self-CONFIDENCE (knowing you are good at something because you have objective outside proof).

I don’t even like the word self-esteem any more; it has become so confounded and confused that it means virtually nothing.

I have no problem with people taking pride in doing something well. The problem comes when people are told that every effluvium they produce is WONDERFUL and SPECIAL and is worthy of praise. We need to use a little discernment here – kids can see through it, or if they don’t, they turn into dangerous narcissists who are agonizingly hard to work with.

There’s nothing wrong in praising kids for good work. But they also need to learn that in most adult careers, you don’t get praised for good work – you only hear it if your work is bad.

By: Mike in Texas

Mike in Texas — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 12:17:19 +0000

The Incredibles borrowed that quote from somewhere else. It was actually: “Just remember you’re unique; just like everyone else”

By: Dana

Dana — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 06:27:21 +0000

This reminds me of my favorite line in the Incredibles…mom tells Dash, “Everyone’s special, Dash.” and he replies with, “That’s just another way of saying no one is.”

I think the problem isn’t so much on telling kids they are special, but in eliminating anything that really develops a sense of purpose and accomplishment. There are no wrong answers, no games with losers, etc. Children scarcely have a chance to truly develop their natural talents and inclinations, but are told they are special when they just stay in the “herd.”

By: greifer

greifer — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 05:47:27 +0000

chances are they stay narcissistic. that;s what the Boomers did.

By: Cousin Dave

Cousin Dave — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 04:49:12 +0000

SO what happens to people like this in the long run? What’s their prognosis?