# Math jokes

Know any good math jokes? Miss Cellania does.

2,000 pounds of Chinese Soup: won ton

1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche

Half of a large intestine: 1 semi colon

She has cartoons and videos too.

Via NYC Educator.

Update: There are more jokes in the comments on Kitchen Table Math, where I cross-posted.

1. Hey, thanks for the link!

2. Just John says:

Not a joke exactly, but…

(12 144 20 (3 * 4^0.5))/7 5 * 11 = 9^2 0

A dozen, a gross, and a score
Plus three times the square root of four,
All divided by seven,
Plus five times eleven
Is nine squared and not a bit more.

3. Linda Seebach sent this joke, which she heard from Lou Talman, a math professor. It’s online with no attribution:

A professor of mathematics noticed that his kitchen sink at
his home leaked. He called a plumber. The plumber came the
next day and sealed a few screws, and everything was working
as before.

The professor was delighted. However, when the plumber gave
him the bill a minute later, he was shocked.

“This is one-third of my monthly salary!” he yelled.

Well, all the same he paid it and then the plumber said to
him, “I understand your position as a professor. Why don’t
you come to our company and apply for a plumber position?
You will earn three times as much as a professor. But
remember, when you apply, tell them that you only got
through seventh grade. They don’t like educated people.”

So it happened. The professor got a job as a plumber and his
life significantly improved. He just had to seal a screw or
two occasionally, and his salary went up significantly.

One day, the board of the plumbing company decided that
every plumber had to go to evening classes to complete the
eighth grade. So, our professor had to go there too. It just
happened that the first class was math. The evening teacher,
to check students’ knowledge, asked for a formula for the
area of a circle. The person asked was the professor. He
jumped to the board, and then he realized that he had
forgotten the formula. He started to reason it, and he
filled the white board with integrals, differentials, and
other advanced formulas to derive the result he needed. He
got “minus pi times r squared.”

He didn’t like the minus, so he started all over again. He
got the minus again. No matter how many times he tried, he
always got a minus. He was frustrated. He gave the class a
frightened look and saw all the plumbers whisper: “Switch
the limits of the integral!!”