The trials of Testaclese

If college women can celebrate Valentine’s Day as V-Day, in honor of Eve Ensler’s “Vaginia Monologues,” what about P-Day?Christina Hoff Sommers describes what happened at Roger Williams University when College Republicans tried their hand at satire. Two students received letters of reprimand and were placed on probation.

The costume of the P-Day “mascot” — a friendly looking “penis” named Testaclese, has been confiscated . . .

. . . The week before V-Day, the Roger Williams campus was plastered with flyers emblazoned with slogans such as “My Vagina is Flirty” and “My Vagina is Huggable.” There was a widely publicized “orgasm workshop.” On the day of the play, the V-warriors sold lollipops in the in the shape of–-guess what? Last year, the student union was flooded with questionnaires asking unsuspecting students questions like “What does your Vagina smell like?” None of this offended the administration or elicited any reprimands, probations, or confiscations.

The campus conservatives artfully (in the college sense of “artful”) mimicked the V-Day campaign. They papered the school with flyers that said, “My penis is majestic” and “My penis is hilarious.” The caption on one handout read, “My Penis is studious.” It showed Testaclese reclining on a couch reading Michael Barone’s Hard America, Soft America.

“Testaclese” tipped the scales when he approached the university Provost, Edward J. Kavanagh, outside the student union. Apparently taking him/it for a giant mushroom, Provost Kavanagh cheerfully greeted him. But when Testaclese presented him with an honorary award as a campus “Penis Warrior,” the stunned official realized that it was no mushroom.

What’s OK for the goose should be OK for the gander, right?

About Joanne


  1. Personally, I’m surprised this didn’t happen years ago, what with V-Day practically begging to be parodied.

    But if Valentine’s Day becomes Vagina Day, what turns into P-Day? Passover?

  2. Gasp! Banning P-Day would be Sexist™!

    As for the term “V-Day,” it should be banned along with all other traces of Eurandroppressive imperialist militarism. 🙂


  3. Okay, maybe I’m an overly linear thinker here, but how on earth can a woman’s external genitalia be “flirty”?

    I don’t know. I just wish BOTH genders (or should that be ANY and ALL genders, this being a college campus) would just keep it in their pants. There are some things you don’t want to know about a stranger…

  4. I’m with ricki, and I said as much in my post about the Vagina Monologues on my blog at

    My take is, if you want to glorify your vagina, can the guys also glorify your vagina? Seems to me that the women are objectifying themselves and would scream bloody murder if anyone else objectified them. Or in this case, the school administration is screaming bloody murder about the guys but not about the women.

    Is there no end to this PC crap?

  5. I’m waiting for the sequel, Vagina Dialogues.

  6. Darren wrote:

    Is there no end to this PC crap?

    When you can enjoy the thrill of accomplishment and the courage of your convictions with little effort and no risk?

    I only wish I could figure out how to make a buck off the self-aggrandizing posturing of the left. I’d be a billionare before lunch time.

  7. Ross the Heartless Conservative says:

    Roger Williams is a rich kids school. I am surprised the kids are not already lawyered up. Based on the facts as presented in the article, it is hard to see how the school would have a chance of winning a lawsuit.

  8. Walter E. Wallis says:

    I don’t even want to know what Gay males would celebrate – I can always go to Castro street If I get curious. And I won’t.

  9. Ross the Heartless Conservative says:

    It sounds like the administrators are being a Testaclese.

  10. It sounds more like the administrators have internalized a generalized anti-male attitude, yet if experience elsewhere is any guide they probably look the other way when their “student” athletes get out of hand with their “masculinity”.

    I’ll bet a pitcher of good beer that all the P-Day activists were male and white (the designated oppressor group) and thus fair game for suppression under the rules of P.C.  A Hispanic P-day festival would probably leave the admins chewing their nails to stubs trying to figure out how to respond.

  11. A Hispanic P-day festival would probably leave the admins chewing their nails to stubs trying to figure out how to respond.

    But at least Testaclese would have been wearing a turtleneck [rim shot]