Gunny therapy

From Bloodletting: A Marine Grunt Goes to Med School comes a prescription for “Gunny therapy” for whiners and brats.

When some “out of control teen” comes marching out on stage dressed like a Harry Hines Hooker, flicking people off, and calling her mom a bitch, she needs Gunny therapy. She needs someone to come along, smack her briskly about the ears, and berate her for her poor behavior until she finally figures out that the beatings will continue until morale improves.

This child doesn’t need to talk about his feelings. He doesn’t need peer counseling. He doesn’t need “a self-affirmating environment producing synergistic moods conducive to realizing his full personhood.” He needs someone to stand tall and give him a good, swift kick in the ass.

Don’t try this outside the Marine Corps.

About Joanne


  1. Gunny Therapy should be used on the parents who raised these kids – please – parents to set limits for their kids and stick to them raise good kids – parents who apologize for being a parent and acting like a parent and or ignore their kids get bad kids as a result- I am the parent of a 13 year old and a 15 year old – they would just as soon crawl under a rock than get “the look” from me. Parents – please – don’t depend on the schools, gunny therapy, or any one else – pay attention to your kids – set limits for your kids and stick to them – discipline your kids (and I don’t mean beat them)- talk to your kids, listen to your kids, don’t be their friend – be their parent – love them!

  2. Walter E. Wallis says:

    Maggie for President.

  3. I agree with you, Maggie. I don’t know the situation in the States quite well yet, but apparently disciplining child is a big problem in Japan today. Both parents are too busy to work outside and they depend on schools, they tend to leave their kids alone.

    Parents need to be careful not to abuse the right to discipline but they need to beat then out of love.

  4. If not a literal kick in the butt, then most certainly a verbal kick in the butt. (Or is that illegal, too?) I’ve seen DIs who could reduce one of these punks to a quivering pile of Jell-o in about thirty seconds flat just with words. It’s exactly what they need too.

    If a teen is that far gone, he’s got to have someone take all the power away from him before he can make any improvement, and these self-esteem types just don’t have the stomach to do it.

  5. Gunny Therapy sounds like the cure for what ails many of the kids that warm seats in my classes. I often ask lazy under-achievers if he/she has anyone at home to kick his/her ass. I’m speaking metaphorically, of course. These slackers need a motivator, someone who outranks them and can ruin their whole day, weekend, week, or month if need be. At school just yesterday I heard a girl call her mom a “f**king bitch” over the phone. She needs the Gunny, or someone to play the Gunny. Looking back, my parents didn’t do enough ass-kicking with me. I knew I needed it, so I jointed the military at 18, got my ass kicked into line, and learned self-discipline. It was one of the best moves I’ve ever made in my life, even if I did end up in Vietnam. Thank God for Drill Instructors.

  6. Tonight I got an e-mail/job advertisement from the Arkansas Dept. of Education [I live in Boston?] advertising the following position:

    Positive Behavioral Support Consultants Needed!

    It highlights the following goal:

    To improve the use of positive behavior interventions, thereby, reducing discipline referrals, suspensions and expulsions.

    Gee, should I pack up and leave?

  7. Positively!

    Uhh, do they give you a clue about what a “Positive Behavioral Support Consultant” actually does? The description just reeks of euphemistic misdirection.

  8. I have a goodly number of young “adults” (college students) who would heartily benefit from Gunny Therapy.

    The problem that I see is, I think, kids coming from families where the parents feel terribly guilty about not spending time with them, or want to give them “everything they never had.” And so you get 20 year olds carrying around such massive senses of entitlement, that it’s hard to fit anything else into their heads.

    Just recently: had a student griping at me that I didn’t have the grades up “fast enough” on the online system. She demanded that she had “no way of knowing how she was doing” (I reminded her that I had said the first day of class anyone was welcome to come to my office anytime and I’d go over their grades with them). Turns out she didn’t know how she was doing because she was absent the past five days I handed things back…as she found out when I returned papers the end of that class.

    I guess I need to get tougher. Instead of “Gunny Therapy” I do “Tired Mom Therapy” where I look at them, sigh, and just don’t respond to their cracks.

  9. I agree about the college students. I blame the baby boomers. Then again, I like to blame them for lots of things. I’m a “Gen X” with “depression-baby” parents. Sadly, I figure the baby boomers started making a mess of things about the year I was born – 1968.

  10. If a child or teenager is whiny, disruptive, unachieving, or just warming seats and wasting tax-money, I recommend Stay At Home Therapy instead. Just stay at home and do something else until you are mature enough. Maybe you can learn more on your own. Maybe you’re just fated to be a slacker all your life, so start your slacking now, and leave the education budget for those who can benefit from it.

    Gunny Therapy is a last resort, one I would use only for bullies and other abusive kids. And while girls deserve it just as much as boys, any attempt to prescribe it for a girl means feminists going up in arms!

  11. BadaBing says:

    DrLiz is correct. The baby-boomer generation, to which I belong, is the worst generation in US history. They are the fountainhead of most of the sewage that now pollutes our society, and they’re currently in charge.